personal thoughts

5 songs for when you have a lot on your mind

A soundtrack for trying to process it all

Sirus Bouchat

Sirus Bouchat

— 4 min read
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5 songs for when you have a lot on your mind
Photo by @felirbe / Unsplash

Sometimes your mind can't work through it all fast enough. It'll start to feel like you're being weighed down by streaks of mud that you can't wipe clean because you have to just keep moving, however slowly, until eventually you're completely mired and every footstep is a wet, slopping trudge.

Music can't "fix" that, obviously, but sometimes the right song feels like a sharp hose spray-down that gets the biggest, most hardened-on clay bits to work free.

I realize it's been several weeks without a substantive update, and that's not for lack of trying. I might be the only who notices, but I do notice. I'm still trying to work some parts of my mind free (turn it upside down and jangle out the loose change, as it were). Sometimes that happens when I haven't had enough time alone with music. So I thought I'd invite you in to the songs I return to when there's too much going on and not enough space to untangle it all, in case they work for you, too.

Apprentice of the Universe — Pure Reason Revolution

This is one of the shorter songs by this British new prog band, from their first full release album The Dark Third (2006). A girl I had a crush on in college introduced me to Pure Reason Revolution, but I liked them more than she ever did, I fear. Still one of my go-to musical options if I'm reading, writing, working through math or code. This isn't my favorite of their songs but it is emblematic of their other work.

The Lotus Eater — Opeth

This one is a bit less gentle, but it works better if I'm feeling agitated or knife-edge. It's longer, complex, and technically challenging—all things to keep your brain engaged and working so it can't cannibalize itself. I prefer the special edition of this Watershed (2008) album, but it has a lot of variety to it, and I think showcases Opeth's range in death metal and progressive rock.

Astronomy — Blue Öyster Cult

A classic from one of my favorite bands of all time, although not my favorite song of theirs by a long shot. The "nexus of the crisis, and the origin of storms" feels exactly like the inside of my head. From Secret Treaties (1974), widely considered their best and most famous album, this song takes you on a narrative journey: it's derived from one of the core poems Sandy Pearlman wrote that eventually formed the cult classic Imaginos album, centering on aliens who carry an altered human through the experience of history, culminating in WWI. (More on that here if you want to nerd out.) The rhythm carries you through without feeling either sedating or agitating. I have my dad to thank for introducing me to '70s metal (my all-time most cherished music), but yet again I am a bigger fan of BÖC than he ever was.

Streetlight in the Egg — Kaki King

The Glow (2012) album came out just as I started my second round of grad school, and this album was my companion to many all-nighters. It played a frankly critical role in helping me finish any of the reading for our Comparative Field Seminar, which anyone will tell you was a harrowing and traumatic experience, and in our first semester no less. Kaki King is immensely talented, and this is one of the few albums by anyone that I will and can listen to all the way through without skips. Like Opeth, tracks like this one have enough complexity to give you something to latch on to so you aren't just spinning your wheels.

Concerto for Group and Orchestra – Movement III (Live) — Deep Purple in concert with the London Symphony Orchestra

Another love courtesy of my dad, Deep Purple is a forever classic that unfortunately so many only recognize for their one or two break-out successes. The coordination and musical talent it takes to work with a full symphony is not to be underestimated, though. I nearly broke my CD player listening to this on repeat, and for whatever reason it will always serve as my mental soundtrack to Macbeth (??). Yet again, not my favorite song of theirs, but enough to keep you occupied and thinking. Also perhaps the longest drum solo I've ever heard recorded. I embedded the higher-def 1999 live album recording, but you might find the visuals from 1969 more ... engaging 😉

There's been plenty going on, and I'll admit to getting a little lost in the forest-for-the-trees lately. Perhaps you have too.

Things you might've missed

  • Things are already bad and they're going to get worse. If you don't read/listen to Margaret Killjoy, you've been missing out. She summarizes her sense of things in a more succinct way than I ever could.
  • Koji Suzuki has died
  • On punishment and accountability: who watches the watchers?
  • Don't worry everyone, I'm sure the FCC has our privacy and best interests at heart
  • Speaking of which, I'm sure companies also would never dream of violating our privacy and safety for DHS

Some good things, for a change

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